National Infertility Awareness Week (NIAW)

As so many of us know, but for those that don't, April 24th through May 1st is National Infertility Awareness Week! NIAW is a movement to raise awareness about the disease of infertility which affects 7.3 million Americans. 1 in 8 people are dealing with or have dealt with infertility. It's a crisis not often understood or discussed, but has a huge impact on that person's life!

Most people still think that infertility is all in your head. That it isn't a real problem and that it certainly isn't something you go to the doctor about. They tend to think you should just relax and let it happen. For those of us who suffer or have suffered fertility challenges, we know that there is more to it than that.

National Infertility Awareness Week is a time for people to see that infertility is a prominent problem facing one out of every six American couples. It's not something whispered about by women anymore and it's definitely not just a woman's problem. The causes of infertility are split evenly over the male and female problem. As family and friends of a fertility-challenged person, it is important for you to show support! Please remember that the vast majority of infertile couples have minimal control of the diseases that causes their infertility. Giving them emotional support during this trying time is a wonderful way to assist them! During National Infertility Awareness Week (NIAW), please take a moment to learn a little more about this debilitating disease so many of us face!

Visit RESOLVE to connect with others and find out how you can make a difference!

This Is My Prayer

Dear Lord,

I thank You for this day.
I thank You for my being able to see and to hear this morning.
I'm blessed because You are a forgiving God and an understanding God.
You have done so much for me and You keep on blessing me.
Forgive me this day for everything I have done, said or thought that was not pleasing to You.
I ask now for Your forgiveness.
Please keep me safe from all danger and harm.
Help me to start this day with a new attitude and plenty of gratitude.
Let me make the best of each and every day; to clear my mind so that I can hear from You.
Please broaden my mind so that I can accept all things.
Let me not whine and whimper over things I have no control over.
Let me continue to see sin through God's eyes and acknowledge it as evil.
And when I sin, let me repent, and confess with my mouth my wrongdoing and receive the forgiveness of God.
And when this world closes in on me, let me remember Jesus' example - to slip away and find a quiet place to pray.
It's the best response when I'm pushed beyond my limits.
I know that when I can't pray, You listen to my heart.
Continue to use me to do Your will.
Continue to bless me so that I may be a blessing to others.
Keep me strong so that I may help the weak.
Keep me uplifted so that I may have words of encouragement for others.
I pray for those that are lost and can't find their way.
I pray for those that are misjudged and misunderstood.
I pray for those that don't know you intimately.
I pray for those that don't believe. But I thank You that I believe.
I believe that God changes people and God changes things.
I pray for all my sisters and brothers.
For each and every family member in their households.
I pray for peace, love and joy in their homes; that they are out of debt and all their needs are met.
I pray that every eye that reads this knows there is no problem, circumstance or situation greater than God.
Every battle is in Your hands for You to fight.
I pray that these words be received into the hearts of every eye that sees them, and every mouth that confesses them willingly.
This is my prayer.
In Jesus' name, Amen.

Keeping Hope alive in 2010...

Dear Friends,

Where does the time go? It literally passes in the blink of an eye, and I'm finding it hard to believe that it's been almost four months since my last post. Our journey these past three and a half years has certainly been one full of excitement and disappointment, prayers, anxiety, true despair and heartache. And while we've had our share of ups and downs, we know that it's also been a journey filled with love, hope and faith. So much has happened within these last four months, and we hope & pray that the choices we've made going forward are the one's that will allow us to reach our dreams of having a family.

I'll share more of what we've been up to in another post, but for now we just wanted to say thank you, dear friends for sticking it out with us during the rough times and celebrating the good ones as well. Thank you for your support, your hope and your prayers when we needed it the most. We are happy to leave 2009 behind. It was a challenging year (to say the least). We hope & pray that 2010 is a better one, and until our dreams are realized we continue to be grateful, blessed and thankful for all that we have TODAY!

The Quilt of Holes

Hello friends...it's been a long time since my last post, and I hope this finds all of you happy & healthy. Life in general over the past few months has been good. We are just trying to live each day to it's fullest, and appreciate all that we have. Our last failed IVF was nothing short of heartbreaking, and while I do owe you all a proper update, today is just not the day.

I had a very good friend send this to me last Friday, and it really hit home. If you have a few moments to read it, I know you'll enjoy it too...

The Quilt of Holes

As I faced my Maker at the last judgment, I knelt before the Lord along with all the other souls.

Before each of us laid our lives like the squares of a quilt in many piles; an angel sat before each of us sewing our quilt squares together into a tapestry that is our life.

As my angel took each piece of cloth off the pile, I noticed how ragged and empty each of my squares was. They were filled with giant holes. Each square was labeled with a part of my life that had been difficult, the challenges and temptations I was faced with in every day life. I saw that the hardships I endured were the largest holes of all.

I glanced around me. Nobody else had such squares. Other than a tiny hole here and there, the other tapestries were filled with rich color and the bright hues of worldly fortune. I gazed upon my own life and was disheartened.

My angel was sewing the ragged pieces of cloth together, threadbare and empty, like binding air.

Finally the time came when each life was to be displayed, held up to the light, the scrutiny of truth. The others rose, each in turn, holding up their tapestries. So filled their lives had been. My angel looked upon me, and nodded for me to rise.

My gaze dropped to the ground in shame. I hadn't had all the earthly fortunes. I had love in my life, and laughter, but there had also been trials of illness, and wealth, and false accusations that took from me my world, as I knew it. I had to start over many times. I often struggled with the temptation to quit, only to somehow muster the strength to pick up and begin again. I spent many nights on my knees in prayer, asking for help and guidance in my life. I had often been held up to ridicule, which I endured painfully, each time offering it up to the Father in hopes that I would not melt within my skin beneath the judgmental gaze of those who unfairly judged me.

And now, I had to face the truth. My life was what it was, and I had to accept it for what it was.

I rose and slowly lifted the combined squares of my life to the light.

An awe-filled gasp filled the air. I gazed around at the others who stared at me with wide eyes.

Then I looked upon the tapestry before me. Light flooded the many holes, creating an image, the face of Christ. Then our Lord stood before me, with warmth and love in His eyes. He said, 'Every time you gave over your life to Me, it became My life, My hardships, and My struggles.

Each point of light in your life is when you stepped aside and let Me shine through, until there was more of Me than there was of you....'

May all our quilts be threadbare and worn, allowing Christ to shine through!



"God determines who walks into your life...but it's up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go."

Friday morning...

Nothing like getting a call first thing in the morning telling you something you already knew. Jesus, this sucks! Another heart break, another failure. I really don't have much else to say, but just wanted to thank you all for your prayers and encouragement over the past few weeks...it really means alot.

One word...

negative. That's all I've got...

To test, or not to test?

That is the question? I'm still debating on whether to POAS prior to Friday's blood draw. Actually, I'm terrified. Hubby is a stressed-out wreck, and keeps telling me how guilty he's feeling about going away for the weekend. That's probably why he keeps telling me I should test early. Like I said yesterday, part of me wants to and part of me doesn't. I just want to hold onto that little shred of hope as long as I can, I guess. If I test tomorrow, I'll be 10dp3dt, Friday would be 11dp3dt. Another consideration, morning or evening? What do you ladies think? I really value your opinions, so any thoughts would be greatly appreciated!!