Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Being thankful...

Let's not forget, especially with Than.ksgiving only a day away, all that we have to be thankful for! So often we do forget what it's really all about. Don’t worry, I’m not going to ask you to give up any of your prized Than.ksgiving traditions. Go ahead and watch the parade and the games. Drive several hours to Grandma’s house and back. Eat way too much turkey. Take a long nap. Or whatever. These are all great and fun traditions...

But I am going to ask you not to forget the heart of Than.ksgiving. In fact, I want to encourage you to let Than.ksgiving be more than just a day. Why not take time this whole week to remember God’s blessings? If your Than.ksgiving Day is already full with family, then set aside some time on the day before or the day after to remember all that God has given, and to say “Thank you.” Better yet, do this for several minutes each day this week. If you do, not only will you be doing the right thing, since God deserves thanks for all he has done for you, but also you'll find that your celebration of Thanksgiving is richer and fuller than you have ever imagined it could be.

Expressing our heartfelt gratitude to God is one of life’s greatest joys. It’s a joy that many of us rarely experience, and it is the true heart of Than.ksgiving. So let me invite you – yes, urge you – to take time this week for real expression of gratitude to God. You’ll be glad you did!

I hope everyone has a blessed Than.ksgiving...we all have a lot to be thankful for!



"In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God." (Thessalonians 5:18).

Monday, November 24, 2008

Making progress...

Yes, I've been the slacking blogger. Work has been kicking my butt the last week and a half, and with the upcoming holiday, I'm trying to tie up all my loose ends here so that I can start it early!!

Anyway, LOTS of updates...I got my meds last Tuesday, AF finally arrived on Wednesday and I had my CD3 blood work and ultrasound on Friday. I have to say that having an ultrasound on day three is NOT something I'd like to repeat anytime soon...blech! Our nurse called Friday afternoon with good results and I started my injections that night!! And remember how I was saying how terrified I was of the needles?

Yeah, it was nothing!! I have to be honest and say that I was totally hyperventilating prior to the "stick", but I didn't even feel it! It actually hurt worse taking off the little band-aid the next morning. So, now I'm a pro! Haha! I go in tomorrow morning for more b/w and another ultrasound (hopefully the little eggs are growing!!)and we'll go from there. I'm thinking we'll probably be doing the IUI's around the end of next week, although I guess it depends on how well the meds are working. Either way, I'm just thankful to God that we've been given this opportunity to try to become parents.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Butterflies...

With our upcoming IUI literally just around the corner, I'm really starting to feel apprehensive. I really, really want CD1 to get here, and yet I'm just so darn terrified of giving myself those shots, of not having it work and ultimately having to move onto IV.F. Ahhh! I'm trying to find comfort where I can, and what better place to put all my fears, then in the hands of God? I know that there is a reason He has put the IF "speed bump" in our path...I call it that because I have faith that we will get over it. I know that the plans He has for our family are greater than I could ever imagine. I know He only gives the difficult paths to those He knows can travel them. I know HE is always in charge, as much as we'd like to think WE are!

I came across a few inspirations this week...



And I've started saying this prayer daily, along with my St. Therese novena...


I'm clinging to them like Linus clings to his security blanket. God is my security blanket, and as long as I trust in Him, all things are possible!



"Therefore, I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them."
(Mark 11:24)"
.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Cautiously optimistic...

that is how I've found myself feeling since November started. We've been TTC for over 18 months now, infertility has become a huge part of our lives, and we're getting ready to take the first scientific step in trying to become pregnant. I'm scared out of my wits that this might actually happen, and praising God at the same time!! If it is God's will, because let's face it, it really is ALL up to him whether we become parents or not, we could be expecting a baby in August 2009...WOW!!! It just seems so surreal!

We got our IUI packet on Saturday that contained our cycle instructions, information for the on-line medication teaching for the injectables, a medication teaching booklet and consent forms which have to be either signed at our facility, or in front of a Notary Public. It's quite overwhelming and I'm more than nervous about the injections, but I'm going to sit down tonight with A and read through everything. I know if I/we have any questions or concerns, I can always call our nurse and she'll walk me through everything...she's awesome! I've also been saying my daily novena to St. T.herese...we can use all the help we can get!!

Friday, November 7, 2008

A Letter to My Sisters

I read this post a while ago on Andrea's blog and thought it was fitting to share with my fellow IF sisters...

Infertility is like a party- a big, year or two long party that no one really wants to go to. In fact, it is a pretty lousy party, not much fun at all. But by the time you get the invitation, you are already there. Perhaps it is your doctor that gives you the invitation, or a specialist, or perhaps just plain old time that gives you the nudge that this is one party you won’t be missing.

So we all show up at this party kicking and screaming. But since this party is held in our honor, we wipe our tears and look around the room. We see our mothers, our aunts, our sisters, and the lady down the street. The check-out lady is there, and so is the attorney, the school principal, and the taxi driver’s wife. When we see them at first we are surprised- “I didn’t know you were invited too…” we say. But when we start to talk with them and learn their stories we know instantly we are sisters, and that their grief is our own, and that we aren’t quite so alone.

This party is filled with sisters. My mother and perhaps yours too, was at this party once. So were many friends of mine. I am always humbled by seeing how many sisters I have here. Even as sisters leave, new ones come to take their place. I spent a long, long time there before it was my turn to leave. You too will leave this party someday.

There are parting gifts at this party, but most of us are so glad to leave when our time is up that we just throw them in our purse and forget they are there. Then one day, while we are looking for something else, we dig out a little box. Oh yes, our gift. We were looking for what to say to a sick friend, or perhaps how to handle some adversity that came our way and we found this little box in the bottom of our bag. We open it slowly, and there inside we find it. Endurance. Strength. Compassion. We were strong, and once walked through the fire she has made us stronger still. We have endured what would have once broken our hearts, devastated us, and come through with a strength that will not easily be silenced. And compassion. Our hearts have grown and now we can, without judgment, embrace each other in ways we couldn’t before. We know the true meaning of kindness, and the value of compassion. We see humanity, for all it’s sadness and all it’s emptiness, and we can’t do anything but wrap our arms around her in a warm, full embrace. We understand each other’s sorrow, and we share our strength.

And so My Sister, stay strong. I understand how hard some days are, and I know how deeply you want this to end. Please know that it will, and that you do have the strength to endure this. You will. You will move forward because you desire this more than anything in your life. You will conceive, or you will adopt, or you will foster children. You will someday leave this place, this party in your honor, but you will remain a Sister forever.



"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."(Isaiah 41:10)".

Monday, November 3, 2008

Just a little pinch...

Yep, that's what the Dr. said prior to her (TMI ahead) clamping my cervix, where I in turn almost leapt off the table! UGH!! To be honest, that was really the worst part of the whole procedure. I did have some pretty intense cramping as she was inserting the catheter and dye, but it only last for about a minute and the Dr. and the nurse were so awesome! Dr. R was super gentle, and she explained everything as she went along. The good news is that both my tubes are clear!!!! To say I'm relieved is an understatement, and I praised God right there on the table for answering my prayers!! The clamping, cramping and tiny bit of spotting afterwards was well worth the peace of mind this test has given us. Now we're just praying that A's third SA shows some improvement...oh yeah, and that we have a successful IUI this month! Sheesh, can it be that I'm actually feeling a little optimistic this month?!?!